Noticing November–Day 27

We took a few days off to travel, to celebrate with family and friends, and to rest. Remember rest? It’s that thing we used to resist as children when ordered to take a nap. As adults, we still often fuss and roll our eyes when urged to reduce the number of “opportunities” to which we say “yes” without realizing that our “no” is often the “yes” of much larger (and deeply beneficial!) proportions.

As a society, we guard our busyness as though it were a treasure (often while simultaneously fussing about all we HAVE to do!) and, in the process, reduce our energies and availabilities for those we proclaim to hold most dear…including ourselves. I know. I did it, too.

It almost wrecked me.

These days I am more likely to pull over and check out God’s artistry, take the backroad home, and fill my phone with photos of beautiful leaves, odd signage that makes me laugh, and look for all the hearts God has secretly sprinkled throughout the natural world on my neighborhood walks.

What I’ve noticed is that

1. I am calmer in my spirit. (Although sometimes I still struggle with feeling “lazy” when I say no, I’m working to get over it–and get over myself!!–and hope to recover soon! smile.)
2. Things still get done without me being in charge or running at break-neck speed! (Imagine that?!!)
3. Other people have the chance to participate, develop or show off their talents, and be complimented.
4. “I” get to say “THANK YOU!” and “great job!” and “look at YOU!!” WAY more often. I love that! In fact, it might be one of my favorite things–ever.

I wish I had noticed that sooner.

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

How big?

I go through my days talking to God. Sometimes it’s really funny stuff and I end up laughing. Sometimes there is no humor at all. I LOVE that I serve a God who is more than ok with both!

This week in Bible study I shared about the rough-looking sticky note attached to the window frame in front of my kitchen sink. It used to be hot pink and crisp in appearance. That is no longer the case.

I can’t tell you when I stuck it there. I can’t even tell you where I found the quote or who said it. What I CAN tell you is that it is a daily challenge to me as I talk with God about matters great and small.

It has become my perpetual reminder to make my prayers larger than my circumstances…and about more than just MY circumstances. Each time I see it I am reminded of Paul’s prayers for the early church at Ephesus (Ephesians 3:20-21) and I am challenged to pray for things that ONLY God can do.

Who and what are YOU praying for today? Does the size of your prayer match the size of your God? Food for thought.

Grace and Peace!

NCN2022–Day 15

Welcome to the midpoint!! Yesterday I talked about this challenge having mental health benefits. One of the biggest of those is that refraining from complaining is an exercise in self-care. Not only does it require self-control, it forces your brain to choose different pathways and focus on solutions instead of becoming bogged down in self-pity or selfishness. It requires more of us. It stretches us and enlarges our viewpoints as well as our vocabularies. Both are good things–and those are just the beginning!

I heard a sermon this week about the characteristics of God and how His goodness toward us may not always come packaged as we would like, but that it is still, at the core, good for us. I believe that this challenge has similar characteristics in that while we may feel constrained, we are actually stretching our boundaries for increased patience, more creative problem-solving, and improved relationships.

I remember reading about someone whose deepest insult was that something was “common”, meaning that it required no imagination, no insight, and no use of skill. Complaining has taken on that “common ” quality simply because it has become so much a part of who we are as humanity. Simply put, it is the “path of least resistance” for almost any situation. Choosing change over complaining takes effort and will pay dividends we cannot possibly quantify over time. Surely, individuals created with such care and attention by Almighty God should strive to elevate what is within our reach…and that includes actions, attitudes, and speech.

I also mentioned viewing this challenge as a fast, or religious observance. While there are people working this challenge who do not believe as I do or practice any faith, I am encouraged that Scripture addresses what we are attempting head-on:

“Do everything without complaining and arguing.” Philippians 2:15 (NLT)

“Do” is an action verb. What actions will YOU take to be successful in this challenge? It’s time to change the world.

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

NCN2022–Day 14

Happy Monday and welcome to Day 14 of No Complain November! We’re almost to the half-way point and I wonder how you’re doing with this challenge. What’s your mindset for this one? Is it becoming easier or more difficult? “Practice makes perfect,” according to my mama…but I am far from perfect, so I’m not sure that’s my best quote for this. Oh, well.

It is our 7th year for this challenge and I am finding it much easier this year. It’s certainly less of a struggle than I found it on year 1! I think it is because I’ve tried to incorporate this practice outside the month of November, as well.

I do not always succeed. I do, however, remind myself to start again when I fail. That’s a habit we all need to acquire and apply across a broad range of topics.

In some ways, I’ve come to view this challenge as a mental health issue. I believe it is always healthier to focus on positive outcomes and make plans to succeed. Choosing to acknowledge difficulties is also a healthy behavior, but awareness of a problem doesn’t have to lead to complaining about it. Finding ways to remove, mitigate, or improve a situation requires brainpower and determination to succeed, while complaining seems to indicate a sense of powerlessness. I’d say that energy could be better spent choosing to meet the task at hand head-on and make life better for everyone involved.

This challenge originally started from a discussion about Lent and what some friends and I had chosen to give up temporarily, so I also see this NCN practice as a voluntary fast. It is a deliberate choosing to set aside our “right” to complain in search of a greater peace, a focus on more positive actions, and an example of self-control.

These things contribute to improved mental health, as well.

So much of our society seems focused on acquisition, entitlement, and being in control. Imagine a world, a workplace, a home, or even close relationships in which these efforts were directed the acquisition of peace, the entitlement of each person to be treated with dignity, and the expectation of being able to change for the better by being in control of ourselves. Hmmm…sounds like becoming a person of influence to me…

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

NCN2022–Days 4-6

Welcome to Friday and our first weekend of NCN2022, fellow travelers! Earlier this week, my dear friend Kelley posted a cheerful reminder from littlesunnydoodles. I immediately grabbed a quick screenshot knowing it was PERFECT for this weekend!

I’ve already heard several of you–including some who have done this challenge multiple times–say that you have already “failed” at this one. I promise you that isn’t possible…unless you just flat-out quit. Anytime and EVERY time you think you might have failed, just take a deep breath and start over! (That’s great advice for more than NCN, btw!!)

Think of NCN as a fun way to

*build perseverance and coping skills!

* CHOOSE a better attitude!

*build a better team!

*create a kinder and more creative work environment!

*teach your family the value of self-control, grace, and forgiveness!

*become a person of influence!

*honor God!

There are SO many benefits to participating in this challenge! Take the weekend to keep practicing, do something fun, and recruit a few more accountability partners! I’ll see you back here on Monday!

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

NCN2022–Day 2

So, how did you do yesterday? Did you make it through without complaining? Did you ask any friends, family members, or coworkers to join you? Did you ask someone to help hold you accountable or put up a reminder somewhere to keep you focused?

If not, there’s certainly plenty of time to do so! It is only Day 2, you know, and this challenge is always more fun when we invite others to join us!

Once again, I’ll cover the basics for anyone who might be new to #NCN2022:

1. No complaining allowed…for the whole month of November.

Simple, right? Ha! Not so fast, people! We all know it IS simple AND we all know it will take some serious effort at some point during the upcoming days. Such efforts can always benefit from having group support!

While each of us will have to govern our own tongues, it really does get easier if you know the people around you are also trying to govern their speech, as well. Having a partner–or 2 or 20!–nearby can also make things a LOT more fun.

There are all kinds of ways to stay on track. Maybe it just a simple sticky note placed on your mirror, dashboard, or desk top. Perhaps there’s a community penalty jar with a small fine to be paid for each slip of the tongue or bad attitude (ooooh, that caught your attention, didn’t it?! Yes, attitude counts!!) with the money collected going toward a charity over the holidays. (ProTip? Make it something you all hate, so there’s further incentive NOT to fill that jar! And, then feel free to make a donation to one you love afterward!) What about a sign posted in the breakroom inviting others to join in or a place for a positive quote of the day? Add the hashtags #NOCOMPLAINNOVEMBER2022 #NCN2022 or just #NOCOMPLAINNOVEMBER to social media posts or emails. Give yourself a gold star or smiley face on your wall calendar for each successful day. The possibilities are only limited by our imaginations!

Whatever you do and whoever you ask to join you, I’d love to see it or hear about it! You can comment at the end of a blog post, send me group or post-it note photos, emails, or smoke signals. Share the posts with others via email or on Facebook and invite your whole feed to join us! Tag @quietambitions on your IG posts if that will make things easier. Anything you share with me could end up in a future post, though, so keep that in mind and keep it clean! (grin. Some of you just had to rethink it, didn’t you?!)

Even though this is a SIMPLE goal, the actial doing of it takes some diligence to accomplish. “Many hands make light work” according the sages, so grab a few encouragers around you and let’s make a difference in the world around us this month!

You can do this! WE can do this!!

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

The Advent of Lent?

Chapel at Callaway Gardens

Tomorrow marks the first day of the Lenten season…and I’ve been waiting for it. As someone who has only practiced this tradition for a few years, I’m still “new” enough to look forward to it and be surprised by it at the same time.

I’ve been thinking about how to observe it this year and, based on my own discomfort level with becoming unable to stay “in the loop”, I will be taking a 40-day hiatus from Facebook. I know others who are removing all social media as part of their observance, but…I think being FB-free will work just fine for me this year.

This “in-action” is neither earth-shaking, nor novel, but it should still prove a significant change for me. I’ve been doing a gradual retreat there for some time now, and I think this is the perfect time to step up to the next level.

I know. This is hardly worth mentioning for some of you, but I’ve recently realized that I am spending time simply scrolling along with limited interaction. It’s been awhile since I shared anything remotely personal there, so why am I still skating along on the edges of other people’s lives?

A heart, a smile, or a quick thumbs up will hardly build the community I wish to cultivate. That will require more of me–and less of the “knowledge without relationship” that characterizes most of my “social” presence on that particular platform.

In this year of curation, I’ve become more focused on building true community than in simply being aware of people and their virtual realities. If that means fewer surface-y thumbs up and more actual phone calls, texts, or cards to check in with the people I love, then so much the better.

Being off of Facebook for the next 40 days (or longer) won’t automatically make me a more spiritual being, but I’m hoping it will make me a more authentic one in the way I approach person-to-person relationships with people I love…and that might just make it a God-thing, too.

“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

Hebrews 10:24-25

So how about YOU? Are you observing Lent? Is it new to you or something with which you’re quite familiar? How will you choose to acknowledge the Lenten season this year and what do you hope to gain from the experience? I’d really look to know!

Grace and Peace!

NCN2021–Day 23

“Make new friends, but keep the old! One is silver and the other, gold!”

~Joseph Parry, poem (adapted and adopted as part of a Scouting song for use in the friendship circles)

It’s important to become a person of influence–and use your influence for God and for good! There’s so much more to life than being a recipient of someone’s time, energy, and blessing. We’re called to pass those gifts along and help others do the same!

Send a thank you note to someone who has influenced YOU for good and let them know you appreciate them. Share the spirit of Thanksgiving in tangible ways this year–and give them something they can hold and look back on as encouragement to keep on keeping on through the upcoming year. Who knows what your appreciation will inspire them to do next?!

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

NCN2021–Day 15

“If I were to say, ‘God, why me?’ about the bad things, then I should have said, ‘God, why me?’ about the good things that happened in my life.” ~Arthur Ashe

Sometimes we can become so task-focused, putting in the time and the miles, on avoiding the cracks, and bemoaning the hard surfaces that we miss the bright spots along the way. They’re always there, though, for those who are determined to watch for them.

“For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving,” 1 Timothy 4:4 (ESV)

This week, start a list of the bright spots God sends you and place it where you can see it throughout the day.

By the way, Happy Monday and congratulations on making it to the halfway mark on NCN2021! Keep up the good work! You can do this!!

Grace amd Peace–and NO Complaints!

NCN2021–Day 9

“Don’t be overheard complaining. Not even to yourself.” ~Marcus Aurelius

My mama used to call it “fussing”–and she wasn’t a fan. Apparently, neither was Marcus Aurelius.

Here’s a partial list of how it can otherwise be referred to compliments of the online Merrium Webster Dictionary:

For a more complete listing and just to insure that you don’t do ANYTHING that looks like “fussing” today, check out the original link at: “Fussing.” Merriam-Webster.com Thesaurus, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/thesaurus/fussing

And, now that you’re educated on what to call it…don’t do it! (grin)

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!