Confession

I absolutely DESPISE being wrong. I like it even less when the very words I have taught for years become something of which I need to be reminded…by my husband, who loves me enough to speak truth in the most loving way possible and steps out to lead me back to where he knows I actually want to stay. (It’s sweet and precious and I still don’t like it. 😉😂 May God bless him for doing it anyway!)

For the past several weeks now, I have been extremely frustrated by a situation outside of my control. I wasn’t involved until it happened, but it has affected my daily private life in a deep and personal way. I’ve been consumed and yet I have no choice but to push forward and take the lead in “making things right” while those whose fault and responsibility it is remain untouched and uninvolved. It isn’t fair…and that is something that has always pushed my buttons…HARD. I’ve lost hours of sleep over that one thing alone.

All of that is the short story. Here’s the micro-verson: I’ve been really angry and grumpy and whiny in my spirit. Sonetimes that leaked out.

Let me be the first to say, “It hasn’t been pretty.”

Late last week, during a business trip with my husband, God finally made a dent in all of my anger. That wasn’t pretty either. He got my complete attention when He made it clear that I had been spending more of my time laser-focused on all the stuff I was frustrated by in this situation…than I had spent with and on Him.

Oh, Father. It took my breath and it hurt my heart and there was absolutely no wiggle room for denial in any way. Suddenly, although all the things I said above (and all the things I didn’t!) are still true, they no longer held the same weight.

When you understand that God loves you enough to confront you, there is only one possible choice: agree with Him and get over yourself.

Today I am confessing again (!!!) what I have taught for years:

1. I can’t worship and whine at the same time. (You can’t either.)

2. God’s plan may be for our good, but that doesn’t mean we will always feel good about it. The sooner we get on board with that and start asking what He wants us to learn from it, the sooner we can represent Him well.

3. Anything that takes our focus from God is a misplaced priority…and causes us to sin.

4. There’s only one reasonable action in that kind of situation: confession.

5. Confession does no good unless you also make a conscious choice to repent (make a 180° turn) and make the necessary ongoing changes to return to whatever is in clear alignment with God’s will according to His Word. (For me, that has included deliberately singing praise songs when my mind wants to wander back and settle into to the anger and “unfairness” of it all.)

6. Give thanks for God’s confrontation. He loves us enough to desire a level of fellowship that simply isn’t possible when we’re choosing to give other things priority over Him. And,

7. Remember to give thanks for those who love us enough to always point us back to Jesus and say the things we have (hopefully) been saying to help and encourage them, as well.

I’m not sure who else needed to see this today, but…

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9 (NIV)

Grace and Peace, dear friend. Grace and Peace.

On Easter Monday

I’m so grateful that Good Friday and Resurrection Sunday BOTH lead to Easter Monday. It reminds me that beyond the pain and betrayal,

the separation and the darkness,

the questions and the grief…

and, yes, even beyond the wonder and the celebration…

there is Monday.

Monday is the day for picking back up again that which was laid aside, for starting over, for beginning again, THIS time in the knowledge that we can now say, “Thank You!” for our forgiveness instead of, “I hope so. Maybe? What else do I need to do? It’s all on me.” Our world is changed and all things can be made whole again.

Begin anew and celebrate the immeasurable gift of grace.

“Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!“

2 Corinthians 9:15 (CSB)

Grace and Peace!

Sorry much?

i have at least 1 half-written post in my draft section for this blog about forgiveness. I’ve been considering this topic for quite some time now. As I have been focusing on practicing the character and the ways of Jesus this year, it is a topic that continues to come up in conversations, readings, and prayer.

We ALL know what God has to say about forgiveness. I could list each verse from Scripture below for us to read again…but until we CHOOSE to be obedient, more reading of what we already know won’t be helpful.

I know all of this for a fact because I am working and walking it out in my own life right now…about a situation that happened more years ago than I’d like to say.

You should know that I just erased almost 3 paragraphs from this post. Apparently, God isn’t ready for me to share more about that right now. Fine. I can take a hint…and this is the one he sent me earlier today as I checked my IG account.

Maybe the hint isn’t just for me.

Grace and Peace!–and, oh, yes…forgiveness.

It’s the small things

You can tell that this one is tiny–less than 3″ tall and wide–and, yes, that is the one lone pecan I “harvested” on the sidewalk after the removal of the giant pecan tree…and the 2 little heart-shaped gingko leaves I found on a sidewalk back in the fall. I obviously hold on to some things longer than I should. I think we all do.

Selah. (That means “pause and think about that for a bit.”😉)

It’s always the small things that end up making the difference. If only we held on to the joys of laughter, relationships, and child-like wonder as tightly as we do the bad attitudes, grudges, and hurt feelings. What a Christmas it could be! Ah, well. Some things we just let lie in place until we no longer realize they aren’t actually serving any good purpose. Some housekeeping seems required all around, I’d say, but I digress! Back to the Nativity scene, which should help bring things back into focus for each of us.

I bought this piece because you can tell it’s older and I liked the look of it even though it is actually plastic. However! I didn’t really look at it closely until recently. What I saw then made me laugh…and then think again.

Here’s the laughter part: at first glance this piece has all the hallmarks of a regular Nativity set. We see the baby Jesus along with Mary, and Joseph. The new parents appear to be in a posture of awe and worship, but if you look at the placement of the Baby Jesus…

Did you see it, too? It looks like Jesus has managed to slide out of the manger and and on to the floor, yet their eyes are still focused on where they think He should be…and not where He actually is.

Annnndddd…that’s what made me think again. We sometimes do the same thing. We look for Jesus where WE think He ought to be and we miss where He actually is. We may look like we’re focused and worshiping, but our hearts and minds are elsewhere. We may say that we’ve forgiven and forgotten, but we still hold part of ourselves in reserve waiting for “them” to mess up again. We may be able to pass the public viewing tests, but the private viewing God still sees may be another matter entirely.

Is there any heart housekeeping that needs to happen today so that we can fully and truly celebrate the Savior this Christmas? Are we focused in the right direction? Have we let Jesus “slide” from His rightful place in our lives? Are there ‘things’ we’re holding onto that do not serve us well and might actually be interfering with our worship this season?

Yes, indeed. Housekeeping might be beneficial all around.

Selah. (Again…and again.) I’ve got work to do. How about you?

Grace and Peace!

NCN2022–Day 29

Mercy, but God has had me stirring up in some deep places lately! Yesterday’s post on attitudes and forgiveness stepped into some hearts where pain and anger and long-term frustration have taken up so much of the space God has marked out for joy, peace, and love. I’m pretty sure He knew it was best for us to practice the NO COMPLAIN LIFESTYLE for a bit before He brought all that up for us.

Yes, us.

You see, I don’t know anyone who hasn’t been hurt before and I don’t know anyone–other than Jesus–who’s been able to look beyond the hurt every. single. time. and still desire and pursue a deeply personal relationship with the one(s) who hurt them in the first place. It’s what makes Him divine and what illustrates how far we are from being so.

Forgiveness isn’t easy. It doesn’t wipe away all the damage. It doesn’t mitigate or expunge the wrong. It doesn’t excuse the behavior and it doesn’t gloss over how our resulting emotions have been affected. It also doesn’t negate the need for healthy boundaries…in fact, it emphasizes the need for them.

Forgiveness involves deliberate choice upon deliberate choice walked out over time. Choosing the path of forgiveness involves far more than apologies or actions to “make up” for whatever happened. Sometimes neither of those things are possible, so forgiveness becomes what it is simply through a determined and repeated act of will.

At times, forgiveness may be better reached with the help of qualified mental health or Biblically-based spiritual health counselors, but I’ll go out on a long limb to say that it never really takes root unless you’ve experienced the need for and received the gift of forgiveness personally. That’s because the concept isn’t really a human one. Forgiveness is God-given and God-ordained: beyond our scope without His involvement…and often made more difficult because of our humanity.

God knew that. It’s why He sent us Jesus.

As we draw near the end of No Complain November, I hope we’ve also been drawing closer to the One whose earthly birth makes forgiveness a possibility. If you don’t already know Him, I would love to introduce you. He’s not hard to find and He already loves you.

As with forgiveness, the NO COMPLAIN LIFESTYLE is a conscious choice and it goes WAY beyind watching what we say for a whole month. It doesn’t mean we fail to recognize when things go off the rails or acknowledge the need for change. It means we go beyond the problem statements and seek solutions. We refuse to allow what is wrong to keep us captive and step forward into making things work productively wherever we find ourselves. Bringing others along with us and incorporating their gifts and perspectives can be challenging, but it is also far more rewarding than battling upstream alone.

In short, it’s a brave new world. Let’s go make a difference! Become a person of influence–for forgiveness and for necessary improvements–right where you live.

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

NCN2022–Day 28

Well. I wrote it and then forgot topost it! Better late than never!

Happy Monday! It’s Day 28 and we’re in the home stretch of the NO COMPLAIN NOVEMBER challenge! We’ve covered quite a bit of ground this time, learning about how we see what we’re focused on, finding ways to recalibrate, learning to pay attention to how our words affect our mental health, setting boundaries, and so much more. THANK YOU for becoming people of influence for good where you live! Our individual efforts are truly necessary to make a difference in the world at large.

Today, I want to focus on our attitudes as we move forward. This is not the time to stop or even slow down; this is actually an ongoing challenge to improve our whole lives.

I make a point to watch and read content that expresses viewpoints that vary from my own. Doing so has helped me see “the other side” of many opinions and helped either stretch my understanding or strengthen my arguments in several areas. Many people find it easier to go along to get along and, as a result, they may never challenge or see past what they’ve been deliberately taught or have inadvertently caught through their interactions of a lifetime. Even if you end up in agreement with where you started, wouldn’t you rather know you can claim the viewpoint for your own?

One of the most difficult areas to do this is in areas that might require us to extend forgiveness to people who have hurt us or made life more difficult than it should have been. Sometimes those people may no longer be a part of our lives and, sometimes, they’re around far more often than we can appreciate. Scripture urges us to make peace whenever possible. Romans 12:18 (CSB) says it this way, “If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.“

While we can’t make decisions for the other parties, we are still in control of our attitudes. I always like to include the following because I still believe Rev. Chuck Swindoll said it best:

“ATTITUDE”

by

Charles Swindoll

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.  Attitude, to me, is more important than facts.  It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think, say or do.  It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill.  It will make or break a company… a church… a home.  The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we embrace for that day.  We cannot change our past… we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.  We cannot change the inevitable.  The only thing we can do is play the one string we have, and that is our attitude… I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

And so it is with you… we are in charge of our Attitudes.”

Never allow someone else’s poor choices toward you keep you in bondage and repeating their mistakes as your own. Forgiven people forgive. We have no other recourse if we are to follow Christ…and, incidentally, choosing to forgive means we have fewer “reasons” to complain. See how that works!! (grin)

Grace and Peace–and NO Complaints!

Enemies?

I don’t usually listen to a lot of podcasts, but when one of my favorite IG guided-prayer posters liked one of my photo posts, I got a little excited. I went to check out their official web presence. There, I found a podcast from July 24th for prayer and meditation entitled “Love your enemy” using Luke 6: 27-36. The Word says,

 “But I say to you who listen: Love your enemies, do what is good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.  If anyone hits you on the cheek, offer the other also. And if anyone takes away your coat, don’t hold back your shirt either.  Give to everyone who asks you, and from someone who takes your things, don’t ask for them back. Just as you want others to do for you, do the same for them.  If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.  If you do what is good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.  And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do what is good, and lend, expecting nothing in return. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High. For he is gracious to the ungrateful and evil. Be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful.” (CSB)

Enemies? Not me. Not that I know of by name, anyway. I decided to listen anyway. Mercy, I’m grateful I did!

Following the initial reading, the narrator for this podcast asked if anything or anyone came to mind, identified a cause for tension, etc.–and I was amazed to find myself thinking about our modern society and how contentious we’ve become…especially on social media, which can be decidedly un-social at times. I found myself mentally rewriting these verses with a modern twist. With apologies to Dr. Luke and a definite desire not to usurp or dilute the truth of Holy Scripture, here are the words that came to me as I listened once more to the words of Jesus,

But I say to you who listen: Love your enemies, do what is good to those who are consistently in a bad mood around you, bless those who annoy you on purpose, pray for those who are vocal even though uninformed or ignorant, as well as for those who mistreat you because they’re having a hard time and you cannot fix it. If anyone cuts you off in traffic or while shopping, offer grace and allow someone else in front of you also. And if anyone takes you for granted or fails to say “thank you!”, don’t hold back your help from them in the future, either. Give grace and forgiveness to those who ask you (AND even to those who don’t!), and from someone who takes away your place, position of authority, or popularity, don’t ask for them back or try to undermine them in return. Just as you want others to do for you, do the same for them. If you love those who love you, believe exactly as you do, or are only from your faith practice, or political inclination, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love and always agree with them. If you do what is good to those who are good to you and have never–ever!–made a mistake, held a differing opinion, or rooted for another team, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you are only kind to those from whom you expect to receive kindness, public recognition, or advancement, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do what is good, and always extend your best efforts, expecting nothing in return. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High. For he is gracious to the ungrateful, the rude, the annoying, the ignorant, and even those who are evil. Be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful.” (Becky’s brain)

Selah. Think about that with me. I think I might need to pray again.

Grace and Peace!

P.S. You can listen to the original podcast and find others by them at http://www.emberhq.com or find them on IG @slo.prayer.

NCN2021–Day 16

Blueberry leaves

“For grace is given not because we have done good works, but in order that we may be able to do them.” – Saint Augustine of Hippo

No one is perfect and we all want additional grace when we make a mistake. Extend the grace you would want for yourself to someone else today–quietly, compassionately, & completely. Forgiveness is a beautiful gift…

AND, it’s really hard to extend grace and complain at the same time. (grin)

‘For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.” John 1:16 (ESV)

“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” 1 Peter 4:10 (NIV)

Grace and Peace (they ALWAYS go together, you know)–and NO Complaints!

Day 2–NCC2016

Well, yesterday was a real treat for me! I kept hearing from people who have decided to join us in the NO COMPLAIN NOVEMBER challenge and I have loved hearing the stories of those they’ve asked to come along, as well.

One sweet friend laughingly told me that she had made it “about 20 minutes!” into her day before she caught herself! Another texted and told me that one of her friends had just done “sober October” and wasn’t sure they could manage a NO COMPLAIN NOVEMBER right on the heels of that one. (HA! Good for YOU, person I do not know, and how fabulous!) I also received notice that one of my friends is on a very “technical” jury case right now but is “determined not to complain tomorrow.” I love it! Soldier on, sweet people!!

Along with the experiences of Day 1, I’ve also learned that among the many who are attempting this is a returning group from last year–of PRISON NURSES!! Ok, y’all, if THEY can do this, so can we!! From homeschooling mamas, retirees, theatrical professors, public school educators, nurses, accountants, and  engineers  to Bible study aficionados and children, this challenge is for EVERYONE!

Several of my friends suddenly noticed the TIMING of this challenge takes us into the election next week…and they are already cringing. (Don’t even think God wasn’t entertained by this, too! grin) Another sent out the following, “Well, so far, NCN hasn’t been too tough, but I’m fixing to leave the house and mingle with society…fingers crossed and prayed up.” (hilariously true)

My favorite communication, however, arrived late in the day. It was a text that simply said, “Define complaining.”

Y’all I seriously laughed out loud!! As I shared it with some of my line, however, I received confirmation that, perhaps that IS needed, so here it is according to the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary, the “simple definition” is:

• to say or write that you are unhappy, sick, uncomfortable, etc., or that you do not like something

• : to say (something that expresses annoyance or unhappiness)

while their definition for students says:

 

  to express grief, pain, or discontent :  find fault

The Becky-version of complaining adds a little bit more to the pile: to find fault in a negative manner, stating more than the obvious, “throwing shade”, continuing to restate a particular issue, having a bad attitude…even if silent.

Well. I may have just lost some people with that one. (laughter) Certainly, we will all have situations where we will need to make statements about things that need to be better over the next month. It might be a health issue, a broken piece of equipment, or an action or attitude being portrayed in our presence. Such things DO need to be handled, but they do not need to be belabored. State your case and move on. Illustrate your ability to use language succinctly the first time and extend the grace of moving on after you do so.

You can do this! YOU can! And, if necessary, you can also illustrate the concept of self-forgiveness and start again. That’s a lesson we can all use, as well.

Grace & Peace! (and NO COMPLAINTS!)

 

Newsworthy?

Well. This has been quite the week for news, hasn’t it? More than that, it’s been quite the week for anger and vitriol and finger-pointing (from every side) about what is right and what is wrong–especially if your last name is Jenner. Interestingly enough, it is just barely mid-week and the main story in the news…isn’t really the main story…for any of us.

Somehow, in the midst of all of the goings-on, I think we’ve managed to miss a few things.

Here’s the real news:

• There’s actually something wrong with all of us. What’s wrong with us is that we’re all flawed and we’re all sinful…all of us.
• NONE of us have gotten it every bit right so far…and we never will as long as we’re still on this planet.
• Perhaps the saddest news of all is when someone (anyone!) is unaware of who they are created to be…in Christ.
• When someone doesn’t have that knowledge, it is absolutely impossible for their lives to look like they have that knowledge.
• LOVE does not equal APPROVAL of every action or attitude. It isn’t even acceptance of every action or attitude. Love is a lot tougher than that…and a lot more resilient than we ever give it credit for being.
• If I focus on the things that still need to  be fixed in ME, I won’t have time to finger-point…at anyone.

Here’s the better news:

• God still loves us!
• God didn’t wait for us to get it all together and act like we should before He decided to love us…or show us how MUCH He loves us!
• There’s still time to act like we know and believe that.

How will you LOVE today? How will you LIVE HIM today? How will you entice the world to want to know our God today? (Hint: They ARE all the same thing!)

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.”  John 3:16-17

Grace & Peace!